Tānetanga Beach

Louie grumbled to himself as he forked several banknotes over to the scruffy cashier in front of him. Sunscreen, bottled drinks, snacks, beach towels, even a tacky inflatable toy. His son had somehow forgotten to pack everything required for their visit to the beach. Then instead of staying with him, Sean decided to run off and find a spot on the beach while he paid for the lot. 

When he booked a getaway to New Zealand, Louie specifically chose a quiet looking town within the Bay of Plenty, wanting to stay away from the hustle and bustle of the bigger, more populated cities. However, it seemed the entire country had the same idea, as the summer vacation crowds became apparent. It was Sean's desire to visit Ōhope beach in particular. There had to be countless, beautiful coastal areas further afield. Yet here they were, mere yards from their hotel, in what appeared to be a locals hotspot.

As Louie left the gift shop, he swept his head left and right in search of his son. But it was no use, there were too many people. Thankfully, he'd stuck Sean's phone on a location tracking app, just for emergencies. He opened it up, and frowned. That couldn't be right. According to the little dot, Sean was on the other side of the forested headland west of the beach. Sure enough, as Louie approached the hill, there was a wooden pathway up and into the forest above. He climbed the stairs with a grumble. Why was Sean sending him on a wild goose chase? 

Following the directions on his phone, Louie came to an abrupt halt. The manmade path continued to the left, but a wilder, natural path led straight ahead. The only sign of civilisation were several signs stuck in the ground, and hammered to trees. They were grimy and faded, but the message was clear; don't pass this point. He looked at his app, and cringed. Sean was on the other side of those signs!

Nervous, Louie approached the most intact sign, trying to make sense of the worn-out letters. "Something-tanga... Access limited... No kids or women?" He scratched his head, was it a male only beach? Did those exist? Maybe it was a New Zealand thing. But it went on. "Be aware of... effects... Masculinity... Huh? What in the..." Whatever the signs were for, it didn't sound good. And Sean was definitely disobeying them! 

As the trees cleared, Louie gasped at the view. It was a secluded beach surrounded by cliffs. There were only a few men sunbathing, paradise compared to the throngs on the other side of the headland. It didn't look to be dangerous, despite the abundance of warnings. In fact, it was rather serene. A hidden gem of sorts. No wonder Sean had sought it out. Speaking of whom, Louie couldn't see him at all. He followed his phone until he spotted a pile of dumped clothes, a towel, and a backpack. He recognised them all as his son's, and yet couldn't spot him anywhere in the area.

As he looked around, he spotted a man by the water's edge waving out to him. He was relatively brawny, with a short beard, and a bald head. His body hair clung to his muscles, looking like he'd been swimming in the ocean. Louie was relieved, this man must know where Sean was. He dumped his bags with everything else, and rushed towards him. "Excuse me," Louie gasped as he caught his breath. "I'm looking for my son, and I saw you waving. You wouldn't happen to know where he is?"

"Your son?" The man nodded his head with an impish smile. "About ye high, short, black hair, blue eyes, weedy looking teenager who grew half a foot in a week, and now nothing fits him, so he's got hand-me-downs from his nerdy cousins which also don't fit him?"

"Uhm, yes?"

The man snorted, his face twitching until he suddenly burst into laughter. "I'm sorry!" He gasped between breaths. "I can't help it, it's just so funny. You're looking for me, and here I am!"

"Excuse me? No, I'm looking for my son."

"Yeah, I'm Sean. See? I got your trunks on." He tugged on his swimming shorts, which Louie recognised, even if they were a bit generic. "Oh! And the signature scar on my leg!" He rolled his trunks up a little to reveal a nasty spiral of a burn. "From that glue gun incident a few years back!"

Louie gaped at the scar, too perfect to be a coincidence, then back up at the burly, middle aged man. He began to stammer, "Wh...But...No. Nooonono. This doesn't... How could..."

Sean put an arm around his dad's shoulder, who immediately shook off the friendliness and stepped away. "Okay, I know it's a shock. But it's simple to explain. The beach made me a man."

"The beach... What?"

"Tānetanga Beach. It means masculinity beach. It's a bit of a local legend. Nobody knows if it's the sand, or the waves, or the location, but anyone who visits the beach who isn't a man will become one. Simple enough. And it affects everyone differently. It could make you a baby faced twenty something, or a retired old man. Or a middle aged DILF, like me." He pointed to himself with a cocky grin.

"How do you even know all of this?"

"TikTok."

"Okay... This is too much to take in..." Louie paced in front of the man claiming to be his son. It didn't make any sense. And yet, all those warning signs told a different story. Then he paused. "Wait... Hang on..." He jabbed an accusatory finger. "You wanted to go to Ōhope Beach. You left all our stuff in the hotel. You made me spend all that money!"

"Oh, I think he's catching on!" Sean cackled as he slung his arm around Louie's shoulder again. This time, he wasn't rebuffed. "C'mon, I'll explain over a drink. And boy am I gonna need that sunscreen," he added with a chuckle, and a rub of his naked scalp. The two men walked back to the pile of belongings, a grin on one, a frown on the other.

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He had to hurry. His little diversion wasn't going to distract his dad forever. Sean darted through the forested headland until he spotted the warning signs. Tānetanga Beach. He'd first heard about it while trying to find something to do near their hotel. On the weird side of TikTok, he found someone discussing the beach and it's manlying effects. It sounded crazy, and yet after finding more accounts, and even stuff on other parts of the web, he couldn't help but get drawn into the hype.

Sean ignored the dilapidated signs, and entered the cove. Here, there was hardly anyone. A few men lounged on the sand, or bobbed in the ocean, but no women. And most importantly, nobody under twenty. Sean rubbed his hands together, pleased that his scheme was going to plan. Soon, he'd be just like them.

"Oi, kid!" A loud, husky man on the cusp of getting a sunburn caught his attention. "Didn't you read the signs?"

"I sure did!" Sean replied with unbridled enthusiasm. Luckily, the man only shrugged, rolled his eyes, and got back to reading his book, clearly unconcerned. 

Sean jogged further down the beach, dumping his belongings with haste. His feet tingled against the warm sand. "Tingling, check..." He muttered as he tried to recall how to enact the change. He couldn't help but lay and roll down the slight incline towards the ocean, until he splatted into the wet sand. He grinned and rubbed it into his skin. "C'mon, it's gotta work..." He mumbled as that tingling rushed through the rest of his body. A slight, dull pain accompanied the tingles, which only led to him coating himself in more grime. 

Were his feet getting bigger? Was the hair on his arms and legs multiplying? It was hard to tell underneath all that mud. So to finish his makeshift ritual, Sean waded into the cold ocean water. Each step Sean took into the water, he felt a shudder shake through him. When he was approximately chest-deep, he clenched his jaw. "Here goes nothing..." He closed his eyes, held his breath, and ducked underneath the waves, forcing himself to stay under the water as long as he could, until he burst free with a mighty gasp. 

Licking his lips, Sean grimaced and grumbled in a bassy tone, "Ugh, saltwater..." His eyes snapped open. "Wait... Is that my... Holy shit!" He instinctively reached to his face, only to encounter a fuzzy barrier that made his heart leap. He immediately rubbed his cheeks with passionate glee. "It worked... My voice is super gravelly, I have a beard, it actually, really worked!" He felt his face, cradling his sharper jawline. His fingers traced across his rougher skin, and up towards his head, encountering a vast expanse of exposed skin. "Okay, it's not entirely perfect," he grumbled as he rubbed a calloused palm over his bald head. "But only men lose their hair. Manly men. And I'm definitely a man!"

 

Sean waded out of the deep ocean water, his eyes wide as his thick, hairy body came into view. Heavy pecs topped his wide torso, curls of wet body hair clung to his skin. As he reached shore, it became apparent his trunks didn't survive the trip. It took all of his effort not to reach down and stroke his hardening cock. The beach was almost deserted, and it's not like the few men present were looking at him, right? He grasped his cock, his breath catching in his throat. It felt warm within his grasp, and throbbed needily. But it could wait. He had the entire vacation to find a more suitable time to explore his body. For now, he needed something to wear.

 

Thankfully he had prepared for this embarrassment. Sean rushed back to his belongings, and dug out a pair of his dad's trunks, along with his phone. He immediately switched to the camera so he could marvel at his manly appearance. "Damn, I look old," he growled in a husky tone that did nothing to hide his excitement. "I'm even older than Dad now. But man, do I pull it off!" He couldn't help but smile, wrinkles stretching from his eyes, and denting his large forehead. Now all he had to do was wait for his dad to come along. He was going to be so surprised.

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"And you're caught up!" Sean chuckled as he reached into the bag of goods for another cold drink. "Ahh, this is fun. We're gonna have an awesome vacation now that I'm basically your cool, older brother. We can try surfing, or kayaking, or whale watching, or-"

"Hang on!" Louie growled in irritation. "You can't just tell me you deliberately made yourself a man, and then act like we're buddies. I mean, older brother? Really?"

"Yeah! I mean, look at me. I've got to have a decade on you, at least. It'd be weird if we were friends. Even weirder if we were lovers."

Louie grimaced at the thought, but Sean was right about one thing. From his balding dome, to his greying beard, he appeared to be somewhere in his forties, nearing his fifties. Not that the older man seemed to mind. In fact, he looked quite pleased. "And you're okay with that?" Louie asked with a gulp. "Being older than me, I mean."

"Why wouldn't I be? I'm brawny, and hairy, and oh so manly. I'll probably have to invest in a decent hat collection, but other than that, I have no regrets!"

"But what about home? All our friends and family? You won't even be able to leave New Zealand without a proper passport, and I can't just leave you here without any money, or somewhere to live..."

"Eh, that's a problem for next week..." Sean gulped down his cola in an instant, and belched. "For now, let's just enjoy the fact I'm old enough to drink, and call it a day! There's supposed to be a decent Irish pub not too far from here..."

Louie scrunched his face in frustration. It was just like Sean to do something so impulsive, then try to ignore the consequences until it was too late. Which left no more doubt that this bearish man several years older than himself was truly his son. He looked out to the waves, and sighed. Maybe they should have stayed in Auckland instead.